Transfer Day

It’s been one week (since you looked at me*) since my frozen embryo transfer. I have been meaning to write a post to memorialize the day and to let you all know how it went down, but I’ve also been really fucking tired lately. It’s from all the progesterone I’m on to keep my little Sparky nice and cozy inside my uterus, but it not conducive to being productive at all. I took a four hour nap on Saturday. Unapologetically.

Now I’ve always been a good napper. Probably since I was a baby. I love a good nap more than anything. And I’m not talking couch naps, or recliner naps. No, naps should be taken in bed with the blinds closed and it dark and cool. I don’t take 30 minute naps. Mine have got to be an hour or more in length. It makes me so happy.

But a four-hour nap is pretty unusual. Usually I can force myself to three. But lately I’ve been taking 3 to 4-hour naps and waking up like I could go to sleep for the night. And of course I don’t and then stay up until midnight every night.

Maybe I should stop napping.

And I know what you’re all thinking “OMG, that’s a sign she’s pregnant!” And I do wish it to be true, but it is also 100% too soon for any symptoms. Trust me. Up until this weekend, the embryo hadn’t even fully implanted yet. And unfortunately, the progesterone side effects? Exact same as early pregnancy symptoms AND ALSO period symptoms. So I’m not even paying attention and trying to symptom spot. I’m just taking naps, OK? Ha!

Anyway, back to the transfer. I found out on the Saturday before the transfer day that I needed to be there at 1 PM and that I needed to come with a full bladder, a mask, warm socks and a hat.

A HAT?

OK, I knew the full bladder. It’s the same for IUIs. It’s better to see the uterus on the ultrasound and to guide in the catheter. The mask was a given, since it’s required here. The warm socks I also knew, because it is a big thing in Eastern medicine that you need to keep your feet warm to keep your uterus warm. Basically any cold appendages take the blood flow away from the uterus and send it to the cold parts to warm them up. It’s why I’ve been wearing socks all day, and night, for the last several months.

But the hat? What kind of hat? A baseball hat? A winter hat to keep my head warm? Every person I talked to had no idea what it meant. I asked a person who already had an embryo transfer, I asked my mom, I asked my acupuncturist – no one knew.

So I went to one of my FB groups. The one woman said it was to save on PPE, so they didn’t give you one of those surgical head coverings. She said she tied a scarf around her head.

I then got mad and cried (hormones are fun!) because what they fuck was I supposed to do on short notice? It isn’t like you can find the surgical caps anywhere. I wasn’t going to add stress by trying to tie a scarf around my head. For what I was paying for this procedure, they couldn’t spare one hat?

I came to my senses the next morning and figured that I had an old shower cap I could use. It wouldn’t be sanitary or anything (which was my whole point in this, that it defeats the purpose), but if I needed to bring a hat, I’d bring one.

I took Monday off, even though the procedure wasn’t until 1, because I didn’t want to stress or think about anything but the transfer. And after the transfer, I just wanted to rest like I was instructed.

My good friend Marisue picked me up and drove me down to the clinic. She was amazing and sanitized her car and had me sit in the back, both of us in masks, just to be safe. It was so much better than an Uber. And it is always so good to see friends these days and talk face to face, even with masks!

We got there early, so we just sat outside in the car and caught up. I was told to start drinking on the ride down to the clinic, so I did. I was starting to get full and it wasn’t even 1 yet, so I stopped drinking. I knew from experience that you didn’t go right back the procedure room once you got there, so I didn’t want to have an uncomfortably full bladder when I got in.

Once it was 1 PM, I went up and they took my temperature and pulse ox level. (They do this at every appointment). I then had to fill out some paperwork and then they called me back to a room with a couch.

I sat in there for a bit and the embryologist came in to talk to me about my embryo. I had a huge fear going into all this that the embryo wouldn’t survive the thaw and this would have all been for nothing.

But that didn’t happen! My little guy came out of the thaw nice and healthy and the embryologist said he looked really healthy and the cells were nice and plump. He showed me this photo and I may have teared up a little.

The embryo itself is about the size of a grain of salt. But he looked good and was expanding and I was really happy and so relieved.

After that, the nurse came in to go over everything and my discharge instructions. Then it was off to the room to change into a gown, booties over my warm socks, and my hat. They gave me a hat, so I didn’t have to wear the shower cap. (They didn’t even ask if I had a hat! After all that!)

They give you a Valium before to reduce the stress and to calm you down so you don’t tense up when they are in there with the catheter. I also read it helps relax the muscles of the bladder so it isn’t as uncomfortable when full.

They do the transfer in the same room they do the egg retrievals in. You confirm with the lab who you are and they put you in the stirrups. Once I was settled, they checked my uterus with the ultrasound and asked how full I was. I said it wasn’t too bad, and the tech and the doctor were really happy because they had a really good view.

Check out that triple layer appearance!

The ultrasound tech said my lining looked really good. She was a really nice woman and explained everything that was happening.

The doctor then inserts a catheter into my uterus through the cervix and gets it all set up to show you where they are going to place the embryo. They then have a camera in the lab of them putting the teeny, tiny embryo into the tube that they will then insert into the uterus. It’s all so small, so you can’t really see much.

But the doctor said she got it placed right where she wanted, and she was really pleased. They then double check the tube to make sure the embryo was indeed implanted and not stuck in the tube (this is a thing that happens, apparently).

Everything I heard was that you then were to rest on the table or in a room, for 20-30 minutes. But I don’t know if that isn’t the case at my clinic or it was just COVID related, but they let me pee, get dressed and then sent me on my way.

I was fine with that because there isn’t much science that supports that sitting with your legs up, or lying down post-transfer helps. Plus with the Valium I was feeling goooooooood and I was looking forward to getting home and napping!

Once I got home, I relaxed and took a nap. I had an acupuncture appointment at 5 and went there to have her do her magic and help him stick!

Since then I’ve been trying to relax and not do too much. The biggest thing is not to overheat and raise your body temperature, which is hard to do when it’s a bazillion degrees outside. So I’ve just been staying inside as much as possible. It helps me keep my anxiety levels down from all the assholes not wearing masks, and keeping myself a normal temperature so I don’t cook the embryo!

So now I’m officially Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise (PUPO) and in the dreaded Two Week Wait. Thankfully because the embryo they put in was already 5 days old, the 2WW is only the 10-day wait. But it’s still feels like an eternity.

I go in Thursday for blood work to see what my HCG levels are. That will tell us if I’m pregnant. I’m not planning to take a home pregnancy test before then because I’ve dealt with that disappointment before and they aren’t 100% accurate. So I will wait to see what the blood work says, since that is the most accurate way to test this early on.

Oddly enough, Thursday is a year to the date of my first IUI. Some people may think that is a bad sign, remembering things with the Lying Liar (and that first IUI was a nightmare and one of the worst days ever).

But I choose to think this is a really positive thing. To see how far I’ve come in that year and to appreciate where I am and that I’m doing this alone and NOT with him.

And more proof that this is how it was always meant to be.

*Sorry for the earworm