Thin It Out

I feel weird posting here without acknowledging all that is going on with the world. And posting here about this small thing compared to the racial injustice going on, and that has been going on for centuries, seems counterproductive, so I’m going to use this space to at least help and give you all some links to check out for people to follow and ways to help as we all learn to be more vocal anti-racists and continue to fight for all people of color.

Nicole Cardoza has a great information and she is offering her information free, daily, in an anti-racism daily email. Sign up here. I’ve just started and already two days in, the information is amazing. You can also find links to donate to her to help support her sharing her amazing knowledge. That she is doing FOR FREE.

If you are able, donate to a charity that is working to fight for racial justice. I donated to Know Your Rights Camp, which is the camp Colin Kaepernick started.

Download the Official Black Wall Street app and buy from black-owned businesses. Find more info here.

It’s not enough for us to share photos and videos on social media and then call it a day. We all have work to do, me included. And don’t be afraid to post or say the wrong things. This is a learning process for all of us. Listen, learn, digest, educate. BLACK LIVES MATTER.

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When we last left off, I was waiting for my Aunt Flo to come visit, and even though there is a global pandemic, I’m allowing her to come visit, even though she’s not the best house guest there is (she is a LITERAL PAIN), because I need her here to get things started. And I’m hoping this will be her last visit for at least 9 months.

She came on Wednesday. With as much fanfare as normal. Although, she was 2 days late. She usually is very regular with her monthly visits. (Also, she needs to get a new place to visit. I’ve had it up to HERE with her and her visits. Stop couch-surfing and find your own place, AUNTIE.) I wasn’t too worried about her lateness. It wasn’t like I was actually pregnant. Sadly.

Once she finally arrived, with her suitcases full of blood and clots, I called the doctor to let her know. They told me to come in on Friday to have my baseline ultrasound and blood work to make sure we could move to the next steps.

I’m not sure I’ve mentioned it here before, but I’m sure I have, vaginal ultrasounds when you’re on your period are no bueno. I’m pretty sure I left blood stains on the floors of my last clinic.

So I went into for my ultrasound and I was interested to see how it was different. I mean, I had only had a wand up my who hah at one office, so maybe other clinics did something fun and special? Spoiler alert: they are all the same.

Although this new office, they don’t have TVs for me to see the ultrasound screen. I didn’t realize that was a luxury and I really missed it as she was rooting around in there because I wanted to see what she was measuring.

At my old clinic, the ultrasound techs don’t say shit. They will exchange pleasantries and talk about certain things, but when it comes to what they are doing and taking measurements of and pictures of, mum is the word. This used to drive me CRAZY. Like you didn’t know good or bad. Like no numbers of follicles or measurements of how they were growing. NOTHING.

And now I have learned WHY they don’t say anything. Because they aren’t doctors. And they don’t always know WHAT they are seeing and to say anything would possibly freak a person out.

Say like the lady that did my ultrasound Friday. I casually mentioned to her that my old clinic had TVs and that it was nice to see what they were seeing. She then took this upon her to tell me that it looked like I had adenomyosis. Which is basically like a hyped up endometriosis and NOT good when it comes to trying to put an embryo in your uterus. It’s basically like NEXT STOP, HYSTERECTOMY!

Of course she dropped this, told me my uterine lining “was not smooth”, asked if I had heavy periods, and then said we were all done and that the doctor would call me after reviewing it.

Which meant I had the whole Uber ride home to GOOGLE this condition and the VERY NOT GOOD PROGNOSIS and then hours to wait until I heard from the doctor. Thankfully I have good friends that talked me down and made me realize that not a single doctor or ultrasound tech in the last year has told me ANY of this. And I’ve had upwards of 20 ultrasounds to go and look at what is going on in there. And this isn’t something that happens overnight. So thankfully I calmed myself and just told myself to wait until the nurse called to discuss it. And ate two chocolate muffins while waiting.

She finally called around 3 PM and told me that my blood work was good, all the things they were measuring were at the levels we needed. But she told me that my uterine lining was still a bit too think, thicker than the doctor would like to move on to the next medication, so I would need to come in Monday for another ultrasound to see the status.

I asked her “so do I have adenomyosis?” And she was like “what? No. The doctor didn’t say anything about that.” She went on to say that it’s possible, since my lining was still kind of thick, but that we would do another ultrasound on Monday and see where it stood. And if that was the case, we’d discuss next steps. But she did not make it seem like was an issue at all. So WHEW.

She asked if I was still bleeding. And I’m like “uh, yeah”. Are there people out there who are done with their period on Day 3? I would like to be those people. Because I’m still bleeding pretty heavily on Day 3 and passing clots. So basically, I think I’ll be OK. (Hell I think I just left a millimeter of lining on the last tampon I took out!) I know I still have bleeding left, so more uterine lining to shed (I usually bleed for 5-6 days). Monday will be Day 6 of my cycle and I think then it will be all thinned out and we’ll move on to the next step.

If that is the case, which I’m staying positive it will be, then we are tentatively scheduled to transfer the embryo on June 22.

I’ll keep you posted on Monday after my next ultrasound. And I’m going to tell them to TELL ME NOTHING AND KEEP YOUR TRAP SHUT!