The Results Are In…

I don’t know why this two-week wait (TWW) felt so much longer than any other TWW. It was literally one day longer, but it felt like time had slowed to a stop and Monday was never going to come!

The Friday before my beta, I had a meltdown and was 99.9% convinced the test was going to be negative and the transfer didn’t work. I had cramps, and they felt a lot more like period cramps. I was also very cranky, like PMS cranky (although that was most likely from the work related emergency after 6 PM on a Friday that put me in a foul mood). I spent several hours in a very negative head space. 

Thankfully, I knew I had acupuncture on Saturday morning and knew that would help me out of that space. I actually woke up Saturday feeling a bit better about everything. The one thing my therapist is always praising me about is that I am always able to come out of the low points. I can be sad, angry, depressed or whatever, but I am very good about owning whatever feeling that is, feeling it, and then coming out on the other side. Because there is nothing wrong with feeling all the feelings. What therapy has taught me is feeling them and learning from them and coming out better on the other side.

Who knew all these years of therapy was actually having some sort of effect? I thought I was just paying money every two weeks to complain to someone.

The hours after acupuncture until Monday morning still dragged, but I was in a less negative headspace, so that was good.

Monday I got up with excitement and headed to the doctor’s office.

Sunday night I upgraded my phone and in my stupidity, didn’t actually ACTIVATE the new phone so it was just a glorified iPod. Which was not good when the way I know to go into the doctor’s office is when they text or call to have me go in. I tried connecting to Wi-Fi, to no avail, and finally decided to go in. Figuring they could kick me out if need be.

Well it turns out their system was down and they weren’t able to text anyway, so it all worked out OK. 

But then of course, my clinic being my clinic, had me come up to the desk and they were all “your appointment for today was actually cancelled. Did you cancel it?” And I was like NO! She said that since it was just a blood draw, they should be able to squeeze me in.

Then literally 5 minutes later the same chick was all “oh, my apologies, it was the appointment on the 4th that was cancelled and rescheduled to today. You’re all set!”

I swear, this clinic could screw up a one-car parade.

Blood work was taken, I used their wi-fi to activate my phone, and I was on my way home to sit and wait for the call.

The wait wasn’t as stressful as I imagined. Because after acupuncture on Saturday, I decided I was going to pee on a stick and test on Sunday. My reasoning was that if it was negative, I wanted to know. I didn’t want to have to sit around and wait for the phone call on Monday to tell me the bad news. And since Sunday was 10 days post transfer, if I was pregnant, the test should show it. Since a typical beta blood test is 10 days after transfer.

Sunday morning, I peed on two sticks. One that was expired, and one I picked up from the dollar store because I wasn’t spending money on something I was convinced was negative.

I followed the directions and waited for it to show two lines. When it didn’t, I told myself to follow the directions and wait the 5 minutes to read the results. In the mean time I was supposed to do my progesterone shot, and almost didn’t do it because I was like “what’s the point?” 

I’ve only ever taken negative tests. I’ve never seen a faint line, never had to send it to someone and ask if they see a line, I’ve never had line eyes. Every. Single. Test has always been stark white negative and no doubt at all in its negativity. 

So when I got this, I sent it to my friend because I was like “that’s a line right?”

And then I sent her the dollar store one, since that test wasn’t expired.

And then I realized that I MIGHT be pregnant. 

I’m in enough FB groups and know enough about home pregnancy tests to know nothing is official until the blood test. This was super faint, so it could have been a chemical pregnancy, so I wasn’t too excited just yet. I was staying cautiously optimistic.

I got the call back from my nurse relatively early on Monday and she shared the good news! I was pregnant! My first HCG level (the pregnancy hormone) was 119.7! They want it over 50, so I was doing good.

I went back on Wednesday and Friday for more follow-up blood tests, to make sure the hormone levels were doubling, which they should be doing early in pregnancy.

Wednesday’s level was 261.24 and Friday’s level was 566.

So the results are in. I’m pregnant! PREGNANT!

It’s so surreal. I still don’t think I have fully grasped the situation. Thankfully my insanely sore boobs constantly remind me!

Next up will be an ultrasound Friday to see how thing are progressing!

We are not out of the woods yet, but I couldn’t not share with all of you. There is no way I could have done this, and no way I’ll continue to be able to do this, without all your love and support. You have all been there for this whole journey, and I cannot wait to share it with you!

#3BBOnBoard