Mosaic

I didn’t expect to take this long of a break from writing here, but then :flails hands: all of this happened and well holy shit. What a world, right?

I’m safely working for home for my second week. I put my foot down and stayed home starting the 16th. We weren’t allowed to work from home at that point, and I’m very thankful things have changed. It was touch and go there for a few days and quite a few tears were shed. But I’m safe at home. In comfy pants and watching TV, working on my laptop from the couch.

I realize I am very lucky in that I have a job and I can work from home. I’m also very lucky in that I’m only having to take care of myself and my two cats. I’m also very lucky that I have literally been preparing for this kind of thing my whole life. I am fantastically good at sheltering in place. I don’t need to leave the house. Seriously. I don’t even really need fresh air or to talk to people. I am really, really good at being a hermit.

I have started to have conversations with my cats. One day last week, I had a long conversation with my kitten about thumbs and how she doesn’t have them. And that because she didn’t have them, she couldn’t use toilet paper and had to instead lick her butthole. And that it was good because toilet paper was scare right now and I wasn’t going to share with her.

So things are fine here. I’m becoming more of a phone person, only because sometimes it is nice to not talk to the cats or myself. And when my boss calls me to check in on me, I don’t think she wants to be on the phone with me for 20 minutes, so I need to talk to other people.

Last Wednesday, though, I got a call from my doctor about my one embryo. I wasn’t emotionally prepared to handle THAT news on top of all this. I especially wasn’t ready to hear that my my ONE-derful embryo wasn’t normal. It was mosaic.

What does that mean, you ask? Well it means that some of the cells are normal and some are kind of not. They are literally testing like 5 cells of a tiny little blob in a petri dish, so it’s not always 100% conclusive. Sometimes these mosaic embryos can self-correct in the womb. Basically it’s that the normal cells fix the abnormal ones and then it’s a healthy baby.

It actually happens quite often. Because they aren’t 100% abnormal, it’s all kind a crapshoot. Kind of like pregnancy and this whole fertility journey.

They have levels of mosaic. Low level mosaics are any with 40% or less abnormal cells. And then high level mosaics is anything with 50% or more abnormal cells.

My little guy was 50% mosaic. He was missing 17 and 19 chromosomes. And yes, it is a little boy embryo. They can tell that too. And when it comes to chromosomes to have missing, 17 and 19 are some of the better ones to not have. And again, they are only testing a few cells of a sample of an embryo.

The lab said they would not recommend this little guy for transfer. And my clinic does not transfer mosaic embryos. So I had to decide what my next steps would be.

In the midst of :flails arms wildly: ALL THIS, I also got a bill for my egg retrieval and insurance DID NOT cover it. This sent me on a rampage with my insurance company because I had it IN WRITING from two different people at my insurance company that I did indeed have coverage. I told them I’m not paying for this and they are “reviewing it” and will let me know in 30-45 days. I have a good feeling they will end up paying for it. Because they really fucked up. And if not, I’ll be contacting a lawyer or whatever because I’m not paying for this.

BUT! I do still have coverage for IVF! It’s through a separate provider and you can only use certain clinics. Which, fine with me! I wasn’t sold on my doctor or clinic, I’m happy to switch if it means I’m not paying out of pocket!

Back before I found out about my coverage, my lovely acupuncturist had mentioned a doctor at a clinic that was not my clinic. She told me this doctor was really good with women over 40 and my acupuncturist had clients who were over 40 and who had seen this doctor and had good results. I looked into switching to this doctor when I was still assuming I was self-paying, and they were way more, so I didn’t go any further with switching.

Fast forward to now, and this doctor is with one of the clinics that I can use with my fertility insurance. So I called and made an appointment, knowing it would probably be forever until I got in to see her, with all the Coronavirus stuff. But it turns out they were doing phone and video conference call consults.

I had my consult with her today. And she’s just great. And so was her nurse. Since I’ve had all the testing and blood work, etc. done already, I can easily start right up with another retrieval with her, without losing a lot of time.

Unfortunately, with :sweeps hands: ALL THIS going on, fertility clinics have shut down to new procedures. Which is 100% the right thing to do. It totally sucks, but it is the right thing.

But my new doctor hopes that we should be good to go in April. Which would be perfect timing for my April cycle. So as of right now, that’s what the plan is.

I’m feeling very hopeful. I feel like I was MEANT to end up with this doctor. She has a PLAN for this. I feel like my other doctor, just kind of did what she does for every other patient, and just gave me a higher dosage of the medicine. And I don’t think that worked for me. I think I went out too quickly and that led to less eggs.

My new doctor, she addressed my concerns with that. She said that is typical for women over 40 and that she has a plan to help with that. And that we will monitor how I’m responding and will adjust the meds accordingly. I don’t feel like that was an option with my other doctor.

So that’s where we are. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that I will be able to have my retrieval in April, and if not then, May. That way I’m not losing months and months, when I’m at the point of not having many months to spare.

So stay tuned as we get started on Round Two!