Why Not?

I will start off with the news so that if you don’t want to read my ramblings, you don’t have to. Also, I shared this on FB and IG, so this is not probably news to anyone!

Right now one of the #DynamicDuo for sure made it to blastocyst, and will be biopsied and frozen. The embryologist said it looked “really good”! The second one is super close to blastocyst, so they are giving it one more day to make it and they will call me tomorrow with the news! But he seemed like it would happen, so since nothing is for sure in this whole process, I will need some more of that good #BumpSquad juju to get #2 to blast!

That means hopefully both will be biopsied and sent for genetic testing! That takes 10 business days, so plan for me bothering a lot of you for distraction over the next 2-3 weeks!

I am over the moon about this. Like legit Kermit arms.

via GIPHY

After I hung up the phone, I ran over to my friend, who was on the phone, and waved my Kermit arms at her and told her to get off the phone! Ha! She smartly put the person on hold while I squeeeeeed and told her the good news. Since she’s gone through this, she was well aware of this feeling.

I’m doubly over the moon because of the odds. I’m sure none of you are familiar with the IVF funnel (actually, I’m sure some of you are). Basically it’s this:

It’s basically saying that in a healthy, younger woman, you’re going to lose so many of the follicles, eggs, etc. in this process. That if you end up with 8 retrieved, it will go down to 4 fertilized, then only 2 to Day 5 blastocyst and then maybe you end up with 1 to transfer.

It’s fucking terrifying odds.

Now add someone like me into this mix. Someone who is 42, who has age-related diminished ovarian reserve, and most likely has already ovulated 75% of her usable eggs.

So now you can see why when they retrieved just 3 eggs, I was depressed. Because at that point, I remembered the funnel, and I was going to be LUCKY that one of those would end up making it to blastocyst, and the odds of that one being chromosomally normal was about 25%. Because 3 in 4 eggs in women over 40 have chromosomal issues.

But then 2 were mature and both fertilized. So I was like “OK, this is already beating the odds!” And as I was talking to my mom this weekend, I said WHY NOT? Why can’t both of these fertilized eggs make it to Day 5? And WHY NOT? Why can’t they both be chromosomally normal? WHY NOT?

And that has been my mantra, and will continue to be as I go on this process. Because why not? Why not me? Why not my eggs? I’ve done all I can to ensure their health, and better my health, so why the fuck not?

There’s no reason why not. None at all.

Keep fighting, my little eggs that could. You are a dynamic duo indeed!